THE 2026 TOP WHATEVER: WEEK EIGHT
The hardworking corn syrup manufactures of middle America don’t turn what used to be hog fodder into a moderately addictive B-Tier Halloween candy just so you can trash it for three microns of internet clout.
The Top Whatever is our method of ranking teams, abstract concepts – and as it turns out this week, molded corn syrup confections – that matter this week in college football. As is appropriate with Halloween approaching, Week 8 was TERRIFYING and CRAVED HUMAN FLESH, and also featured THE DEAD WALKING THE EARTH.
But enough about Dave Doeren, the last undefeated team with an honor code, and the concept of offense in the Big Ten. Enjoy this week’s ghoulish edition … IF YOU DARE!!!
ONE: UCF. Survived by a score of 39-31 in the most spine-chilling episode of the week over the previously second-ranked BYU Cougars. Ranked #1 here for that, but also for providing the most mindbending horror film of the year in their game's final sequence of regulation.
